


Just Hold Me Close Til Morning

by givemesumaurgravy



Series: Good Boy [7]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Arguments, Blow Jobs, Bottom Steve, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, M/M, Role Reversal, Top Bucky, cranky Steve, slight breathplay, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:54:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22776745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/givemesumaurgravy/pseuds/givemesumaurgravy
Summary: It wasn’t their first fight ever, but it was the first time that Steve was angry and Bucky truly had no idea why.Or, Steve is acting weird and Bucky goes over to bring him food. Cue talking about feelings and Steve asking Bucky to try something new.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Series: Good Boy [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1317629
Comments: 6
Kudos: 177





	Just Hold Me Close Til Morning

It wasn’t their first fight ever, but it was the first time that Steve was angry and Bucky truly had no idea why. 

Bucky was supposed to go over to Steve’s apartment and spend the night, but Steve texted him around lunch that he was going to be delayed at the office and that it would be best if they cancel their plans. 

Bucky was disappointed, but he understood. Steve was under a lot of pressure at work lately, though he tried his best not to let it seep into his personal life. Bucky offered to bring Steve dinner or coffee quick, something to help, but Steve told him no.

As the day dragged on, Bucky couldn’t help but feel like he should do something nice for Steve to help him feel less stressed. Steve always goes out of his way to take care of Bucky, so maybe it was time for Bucky to take care of Steve.

They agreed about a month ago that they would use an app on their phones so that they could track each other throughout the day (mostly so Steve could drop in on Bucky and bring him treats or coffee on his particularly stressful days). Bucky decides to use this to _his_ advantage for once and uses it to tell him when Steve starts to head home from the office. 

Bucky stops at their favorite Chinese restaurant and picks up their usual. He times it so he gets to Steve’s just a little bit after him and he uses his key to get into the building. As Bucky rides the elevator up to Steve’s floor, he feels excited to surprise Steve, but he tells himself that he’s not going to stay long since Steve wanted some time alone tonight.

When Bucky gets to Steve’s door, he lets himself in and calls out to Steve. Steve comes out from the hall, dress pants still on, but his button up his half undone. He looks genuinely surprised, but there’s a hint of frustration on his face, rather than the usual joy at seeing Bucky.

“Um, hi,” Bucky says. “I know we cancelled our plans, but I just… I wanted to do something nice for you, since you seemed a bit overwhelmed with work and everything. I thought I would bring you something to eat in case you didn’t get the chance yet and then I was going to head home.”

Bucky raises up the bag of Chinese to emphasize his point and Steve just continues to stare at him. Bucky frowns as he sees the anger on Steve’s face only get more prominent. Bucky’s not really sure what to do, so he sets the food on the counter and then tries to step towards Steve, but Steve just holds up a hand and backs away.

“Buck,” Steve says, his tone telling Bucky he’s trying really hard to keep it even. “I appreciate that you brought me food, but I don’t appreciate that you didn’t listen to me when I said we should cancel our plans.”

“But… why?” Bucky says. “You always do nice things for me and take such good care of me, even when I’m in a shitty mood and tell you not to. Why is it different when I want to do the same for once?”

Steve stares at Bucky, gaze hard. Bucky licks lips and forces himself not to cower and to hold eye contact with Steve until he tells him what is actually going on.

If Bucky didn’t completely trust Steve, he’d think that Steve was cheating on him or hiding something, but he believed Steve when he told him Bucky was it for him. 

“Steve… talk to me,” Bucky says softly, trying to step into Steve’s space again, and this time Steve stiffens, but he doesn’t step back. “What’s going on? You’ve been acting weird all week. You know you can talk to me about anything.” 

Steve takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for just a moment. When they open again, his gaze hasn’t changed, if anything it looks colder. Bucky narrows his eyes at Steve and decides to go for a different tactic.

“You know, this is going to work if you can’t open up to me,” Bucky says. “What are you going to do when I move in here after graduation? You can’t just ignore me when we’re living together! I refuse to tiptoe around you and not feel welcome in my home because you’re in a pissy mood and won’t tell me why. It’s really shitty of you to make me feel bad when I’m just trying to help you and be a good boyfriend. You don’t get to have a monopoly on doing nice things. This is supposed to be an equal partnership, Steve. You have to let me take care of you, too.”

A few seconds tick by in a tense silence, but then Steve cracks. He sighs and then he’s rubbing a hand over his face before taking Bucky’s hand and leading him over to the couch. Bucky sits down next to Steve, leaving a little bit of space between them, but not letting go of Steve’s hand.

“I’m sorry,” Steve says. “It’s been a terrible week at work and I don’t know. I’m not used to this, to having someone to talk to about stuff. I’m much better at helping people with their problems and I _like_ helping people. I’ve been on my own for so long I’ve just gotten used to getting by by myself. I know you have so much of your own stuff going on that I don’t want to burden you with my stuff.”

“It’s not a burden, Steve,” Bucky says. “Part of being in a relationship is helping each other when they need it. I know… I know we’re at different points in our lives and so far you’ve done a really good job of making us feel equal despite all that, but if… if you’re not sharing work stuff with me because you feel like I won’t get it…”

“No, it’s nothing like that,” Steve says, quick to reassure Bucky and squeeze his hand. “Ever since my ma died when I was eighteen, I’ve had to take care of myself and could only count on me to get through anything. I don’t… I don’t think I even know how to ask for help or talk about this sort of stuff, it’s been so long.”

“We’ll get through it together, Steve. I’m not going anywhere, so you don’t have to go through this alone anymore,” Bucky says. 

“I love you, Buck,” Steve says, soft but sure. 

“I love you, too,” Bucky says. “Should we eat? I brought your favorite and you can try telling me about what’s going on at work.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Steve says, nodding.

They eat at Steve’s kitchen table and Steve slowly opens up about his week. It turns out he lost an account that he’d been working on for over a year. It wasn’t an unusual thing at his firm, but Steve hadn’t ever lost an account before, so he was taking it pretty hard. 

“Fury’s disappointed in me, I can tell,” Steve says as he swirls his fork around on his plate. “He won’t say it outright, but I know he’s frustrated. We were counting on the income from that deal and we’re about to end this quarter. I think we’ll be fine, I just hate that it’s going to be close now because I screwed up.”

“Is it really your fault, though?” Bucky asks softly. “Why did they leave?”

“Dunno,” Steve says, shrugging. “It seems like it was probably just some political bullshit, but I know how to deal with that and keep clients happy. I guess I just lost my touch this time.”

“It’s okay, Steve,” Bucky says and reaches over to squeeze Steve’s forearm. “This stuff happens. You’ll learn from it and, like you said, Shield will be fine. Take tonight to feel crappy about it, hell, take the whole weekend if you need to, but on Monday, go into work with your head high and go back to kicking your usual amount of ass because you’re great at what you do.”

“Well, damn,” Steve says, giving Bucky a little smirk. “Clearly I’ve been an idiot to not talk to you about this stuff before. You’re really good at pep talks.”

“Trust me, I’ve gotten enough of them in my life that I’ve learned a thing or two,” Bucky says with a self-deprecating chuckle. “Look, I don’t want to overstay my welcome if you really do want to be alone tonight. I’ll help you clean up and then get out of here.”

“No, really, please stay,” Steve says, reaching over to Bucky and squeezing is hand. “I want you here.”

“Okay,” Bucky says with a shy smile and gets up to start putting away their leftovers.

Steve comes up behind Bucky as he’s closing the refrigerator and wraps his arms around his waist, making Bucky lean back into his strong body. 

“Did I tell you I’m sorry yet?” Steve whispers against Bucky’s ear, hands spreading over his stomach and one slipping under his shirt. 

“You did, but it never hurts to say it again,” Bucky grins, swaying a little in Steve’s arms.

“I’m sorry, baby,” Steve practically purrs. “Come to bed with me? I want to show you just how sorry I am.”

“God, that was cheesy,” Bucky teases, but he turns around anyways and smiles at Steve. “Let’s go.”

Steve leads Bucky to his room by the hand and Bucky feels the familiar swoop of butterflies he still gets every time he and Steve are intimate. He would have thought that the excitement would have at least tapered off or died down a little, but it still is just as thrilling as that first time when Steve opens his bedroom door and guides Bucky over the the four-poster bed.

Steve sits down on the edge of the bed and Bucky does the same. Steve looks like he wants to say something, so Bucky gives him a moment and smiles encouragingly at him. Steve traces his thumb along Bucky’s knuckles and takes a deep breath, making Bucky realize that Steve looks… nervous.

“I… I’ve learned that it’s hard for me to give up control, especially when it comes to work. That’s part of why this whole thing is hitting me so hard. I feel responsible and I hate that I wasn’t able to fix it and deal with it all on my own. I want… actually I think I need… I need you to do something for me. I think I need you to take control tonight. I just… I want to feel like everything’s going to be okay and that I don’t have to do anything except let you take care of me, completely.”

“Okay,” Bucky says, nodding slowly as he processes what Steve is asking of him. 

“I know we’ve talked about it, about switching things up, but it’s just been so good that we haven’t done it differently yet,” Steve says, and then he cups Bucky’s cheek with his warm hand. “I want to finally bottom for you, if you are still open to it.”

“I… um, yes,” Bucky says, feeling his cheeks heat up just at the thought of finally getting to top Steve. “God yes. I mean, um. If this is what you think you need, then I’m definitely willing to oblige.”

Steve rolls his eyes and steals a kick kiss before he stands up and pulls his shirt out from his pants. “Smooth, babe. I know you’ve been dying to get your hands on my ass. You don’t have to pretend like you haven’t.”

Bucky’s cheeks flame even more and he runs a hand through his hair nervously. “Are you sure you’re sure?”

“Yes,” Steve says, now slipping his shirt off and walking over to his closet so he can drop it in his hamper. “I truly do enjoy bottoming, I just don’t do it often. I trust you and I know it’s going to be good because it’s you.”

Steve undoes his belt and takes off his pants and socks, leaving him just in his tight, black briefs now. Bucky takes a shaky breath and then he stands up, too, and starts shedding his clothes. 

Bucky’s thought about this a lot, what it would be like when they finally got to switch things up, but that’s not to say he hasn’t been completely happy. Bucky loves bottoming, and bottoming for Steve is just completely on a whole other level. 

Steve pulls Bucky into his arms and kisses him slow and deep. It helps to settle Bucky’s nerves enough so when Steve pulls back and looks at him, he smiles easily. Steve runs a hand through Bucky’s hair and returns his smile.

“Give me a few minutes, I’m going to go make sure I’m ready for you,” Steve says, voice deep and sexy, despite what he’s implying. 

“Okay,” Bucky says and steals one more kiss before letting Steve disappear into the bathroom.

Bucky lays back down on the bed and tries to hold onto the calm he had before as he waits for Steve. He decides to pull out their supplies, and after grabbing the lube out of the bedside drawer, he hesitates at the box of condoms.

They haven’t used condoms for weeks now, after getting tested and having a conversation where Bucky admitted he _liked_ feeling Steve’s come inside him and the messiness of it all. They haven’t had that discussion with Steve being on the receiving end yet, so Bucky figures he might as well get one out, just in case. 

Steve comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later, briefs on again and he walks over to the bed in what can only be described as a _saunter._ Steve climbs onto the bed and, more importantly, on top of Bucky, completely blanketing Bucky’s body with his own.

“Hi,” Bucky says, threading his fingers through Steve’s hair. “All set?”

“Yep,” Steve says. “All clean.”

“Cool, cool,” Bucky says, a spike of nerves coming back as Steve starts nosing at his neck. “Um, so like, how do you want to do this exactly?”

Steve perks his head up, something in Bucky’s voice clearly alerting him to Bucky’s sudden reemergence of anxiety.

“Hey, look at me, yeah?” Steve says and Bucky forces himself to meet Steve’s gaze instead of staring at a spot just past his ear. “This is a big deal, I know. I’m nervous, too, but I trust you and I trust us. Just be open with me and I’ll be honest with you as well.”

“Okay,” Bucky says, nodding slowly. “I think I want to be able to see you and, you know, kiss you.”

“Me, too,” Steve says. “What if we just keep it simple and I lay down on my back?” 

Bucky nods and Steve rolls to lay down. Bucky bites his lip as Steve sprawls himself out and teasingly slides a hand down into his briefs. Steve, the little shit, wiggles his eyebrows at Bucky and Bucky just rolls his eyes. 

“Stop that,” Bucky says. “That’s supposed to be my job.”

“Oh, really?” Steve says, eyebrows raising. “What are you going to do about it?”

Bucky takes the challenge and straddles Steve’s hips in a flash, grabbing Steve’s wrists and forcing them above his head. Although Steve is definitely stronger than Bucky and could break out if he wanted to, he only feigns a little struggle but stays where Bucky puts him. 

“Now, are you going to keep your hands here or am I going to have to tie you up?” Bucky says, mostly teasing, but he feels the way Steve’s dick twitches against his crotch at the suggestion.

Bucky perks up an eyebrow and Steve just shrugs, “Maybe next time,” he says softly then adds, “I’ll keep ‘em here.”

“Good boy,” Bucky says, a shiver running down his spine at finally saying that to Steve instead of the other way around. 

Bucky leans over and grabs the bottle of lube and condom, holding up the small foil packet for Steve to see. Steve licks his lips and then shakes his head. 

“If you’re asking me if I want you to use one, the answer is no,” Steve says. “I want to feel all of you, however you want to give it to me.”

“Fuck,” Bucky curses under his breath and tosses the condom back onto the bedside table before sliding back on top of Steve to kiss him breathless.

Steve chuckles into the kiss, wrapping his strong arms around Bucky, making Bucky make a warning noise in his throat. Steve immediately stretches his arms back over his head and Bucky gives him a pleased hum. 

“I think I like bossing you around for once,” Bucky says as he sits up on Steve’s thighs and runs his hands slowly down Steve’s chest and stomach, watching his abs clench and goosebumps rise on his skin.

“Don’t get too used to it,” Steve says and Bucky curls his fingers enough to gently scratch down Steve’s stomach.

“I’ll savor every second tonight, then,” Bucky purrs, “Slide your underwear off for me.”

Bucky slips off to the side so Steve can remove his briefs and he can open up the lube. Bucky pours some out on his fingers, rubbing it around to warm the gel as Steve tosses his briefs onto the floor.

“How long has it been?” Bucky asks biting his lip afterwards because he really didn’t mean to ask that.

Steve looks at him with an unreadable expression, almost caught between not wanting to hurt him and uncertainty. Bucky shakes his head and tries to smile.

“I didn’t really mean to ask that. You don’t… you don’t have to tell me,” Bucky says. 

“It’s okay,” Steve says, reaching for Bucky. “It’s probably been over a year. The last time would have been even months before you and I got together. I don’t… it’s never even been something I do just with myself.”

“Okay,” Bucky says. “I’ll go slow then.”

“Whatever you want,” Steve says. “You’re in charge.”

Bucky flushes, but rolls his shoulders back and tries to slip back into the more dominant headspace he had before. Steve’s touch on his bare thigh helps, and Bucky closes his eyes for a moment to help center himself.

When he opens his eyes again, he feels better and moves quickly to settle himself between Steve’s parted thighs. Steve clearly knows what’s coming, so he bends his knees and spreads his legs even farther, giving Bucky a clear and exquisite view.

Steve isn’t shy at all, not like Bucky when doing this for the first time with a new partner. Steve is completely at ease, one arm tucked behind his head and the other stretched over his head, just how Bucky told him to stay. 

It’s been a while since Bucky’s prepped another person, and in all honesty it’s never been his favorite thing to do. He always found it hard to gauge how the other person was feeling and it was usually with a random hook up, so they both just wanted to get to the good part.

But with Steve right now, that definitely wasn’t the case. 

Bucky wanted to take his time with Steve and really take him apart. Steve needed Bucky to take care of him and make him feel good and safe. Bucky wasn’t entirely sure how to do that, but he was damn well going to try.

Bucky starts slow and careful, watching Steve’s face cautiously. Steve shows no sign that he’s even the slightest bit uncomfortable. Instead, he is the picture of pleasure. 

It’s not hard for Bucky to slip into a more comfortable headspace with Steve giving him all the right signs that he’s doing his job very well. Bucky feels braver and slides in a second finger, curling them and making Steve release a slow, deep moan.

Steve’s cock has been lying ignored against this stomach, but Bucky finally takes notice as it starts to leak precome against Steve’s abs. Bucky subconsciously licks his lips and then looks back up at Steve, seeing nothing but pleading in his eyes.

Without more warning, Bucky bends low enough to suckle the head of Steve’s cock into his mouth. It’s a little awkward, pressing in a third finger while trying to swallow down Steve’s girth, but Bucky manages and Steve arches and moans in response.

In the back of Bucky’s mind, he knows that this can easily push Steve over the edge and that he needs to be careful. He waits until Steve is trembling, his moans higher and and more desperate.

Bucky pulls off and gives Steve one last stretch with his fingers, twisting and spreading them before slipping them out. When Bucky looks back up at Steve, his eyes are dark and glassy. 

“Ready?” Bucky asks, leaning up to kiss Steve on his mouth briefly. 

“Yes,” Steve all but moans. “Please.”

Bucky racks his brain for any moment he’s ever heard Steve beg before, but he comes up empty. Bucky relishes in it for a moment, but then he grabs the lube to slick himself up. 

Bucky watches Steve clench and unclench his hands, seemingly begging to touch Bucky, but trying his hardest to do as Bucky asked. It makes Bucky swell with pride and he decides to take pity on him a little. 

“You can touch me,” Bucky says and Steve’s hands instantly fly to Bucky’s face, pulling him down and kissing him fiercely.

Bucky gets lost in it for a moment, clean hand holding him up while he adjusts his legs into position. Bucky breaks free only for enough time for him to give himself a few teasing tugs and then guide himself home.

And for all things holy in the world, if the sound that Steve makes isn’t the sweetest, most delicious thing Bucky’s ever heard. 

“Fuck, Bucky… Jesus,” Steve says, fingers scratching down his back and digging into his waist. “You feel amazing.”

Bucky wants to affirm the sentiment, being inside Steve is the most wonderful feeling Bucky has ever known, (aside from Steve being inside Bucky, of course), but he can barely speak. It’s all overwhelming and has Bucky on the edge or coming already.

“Steve…” Bucky whispers, breath hot on Steve’s neck as he tries to regain his composure. 

“I know,” Steve whispers back. “Take a moment.”

It hits Bucky somewhere deep and warm that even when Bucky’s supposed to be the one taking care of Steve, Steve manages to be exactly what Bucky needs. 

“I love you so much,” Bucky says, kissing along Steve’s jaw. 

“I love you, too,” Steve echoes. 

Bucky takes Steve’s hands in his, pressing them into the mattress on either side of Steve and holding himself up as he starts to rock into Steve. 

As much as Bucky wants to savor every second, he knows that’s not what Steve needs right now and that’s not what he asked for. He needs Bucky to take control and give it to him as fast and hard as he can.

Bucky (and Steve) usually like kissing during, but Bucky quickly realizes that the position isn’t working for him to get good leverage. So with one last bite to Steve’s bottom lip, Bucky pulls back and sits back on his legs, gripping Steve by the backs of his thighs and using the new positioning to his full advantage.

Bucky holds eye contact with Steve, using that connection to tell him when he needs to adjust the angle of his hips or change his pacing. It makes something warm glow inside Bucky when he realizes that they’re so close now that he can tell just what Steve needs without words.

Bucky realizes Steve is close when his eyes start to roll back in his head and his hands tug on his hair. His moans are broken and airy and Bucky never wants to stop, he wants to live in his moment forever because Steve is such a vision falling apart beneath him.

Bucky drops his hold on Steve’s legs in favor of resting his hands on Steve’s pecs, giving them a self-indulgent squeeze. Steve grabs hold of one of Bucky’s wrists, holding unwavering eye contact as he draws Bucky’s hand to his throat. 

They hadn’t talked about this beforehand, but Bucky knows Steve has a bit of a thing for breath play. He just always figured it was the other way around.

“Don’t… don’t squeeze too hard, but… fuck,” Steve gasps, his whole body jolting with the force of Bucky’s thrusts. “I want to know what it feels like. I need… I need it.”

Bucky nods, knowing that despite it being in the heat of the moment, Steve wouldn’t ask something of Bucky he knew he couldn’t handle or that he hadn’t thought through fully.

Bucky nods and although Steve doesn’t let go of Bucky’s wrist, he does loosen his grip a little. Steve gives Bucky a little nod and then Bucky gives Steve’s neck a little squeeze, making Steve’s eyes flutter closed.

Bucky can feel Steve’s throat work and the vibrations against his hand as Steve moans and it makes him press just a little harder. As he does, Steve’s head rocks back and Bucky feels it more than anything else as Steve starts to come.

Bucky lifts his hand from Steve’s throat, not wanting to cut off his air as he works him through his orgasm. Bucky doesn’t let up on his thrusts, however, now chasing his own orgasm.

Steve lays still for the most part, although tiny shivers work through his whole body every few seconds as Bucky continues to nail his prostate. Steve is such a sight like this, Bucky quickly realizes there’s just one more thing that would push the image over the top.

Just as Bucky’s about to come, he pulls out and takes himself in hand, fumbling a bit awkwardly so he’s straddling Steve’s waist. Steve catches on quickly and grins lazily, his eyes dark and greedy as he watches Bucky jack himself off frantically.

“You look so hot, Steve,” Bucky says, voice low and breathy with the need to come. “You’re gonna look even hotter covered in my come.” 

“Do it,” Steve moans. “Please, Buck.”

Steve runs his hands up and down his sweaty chest slowly, his chest hairs damp and clinging together, practically begging to be mussed up even further. 

“Fuck, _Steve,”_ Bucky curses and then he’s coming, thick lines of come painting across Steve’s stomach and chest. 

Bucky continues to strip his cock, completely in awe as Steve just takes it with a blissed out look on his face as he rubs his fingers through the mess on his chest. Once the overstimulation becomes too much, Bucky lets go of himself and falls down onto the mattress, tugging Steve onto his side so he can kiss him thoroughly. 

When their kisses slow, Bucky pulls back and smiles when he sees Steve’s dreamy look. Bucky rolls for just a moment so he can grab some tissues and start to clean Steve up. Steve rubs his hand up Bucky’s side gently as he does. 

“That was exactly what I needed,” Steve says when Bucky drops the tissues into the wastebasket they conveniently keep under the nightstand.

“I loved it,” Bucky says. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I still love it when you’re in charge, but this was pretty great, too. Something to remember for special occasions.”

“Good,” Steve says with a chuckle. “And the… breathplay… that wasn’t too much?”

“Nope,” Bucky says, shaking his head. “It was really hot.”

Steve nods, but he bites his lip and looks down a little guiltily. “I don’t like that I asked you to do that without discussing it with you first. It’s not… that’s not safe.”

“It was okay this time,” Bucky says, squeezing Steve’s arm. “But I get it. Next time we do this we talk about what you need and want beforehand. I think that will help us both feel more comfortable. It’s okay, we’re learning.”

“Definitely,” Steve says. “Thank you for this.”

“Of course,” Bucky says with a soft smile. “Do you feel better now?”

“Yes,” Steve says, stretching like a cat. “You have no idea.”

Bucky chuckles because he knows _exactly_ what it feels like to be well fucked and sated, but he lets Steve have this one. 

“Think you have enough energy to wash up and get ready for bed, old man?” Bucky teases when Steve yawns and Steve glares at him.

“I’ll show you who’s the old man,” Steve says and in the next second he’s somehow scooping Bucky up and carrying him off the the bathroom, Bucky giggling the whole way. 

As good as it was to switch it up tonight, Bucky is glad to be Steve’s baby boy again, even just for a moment.

**Author's Note:**

> leave some love or prompts for this series in the comments
> 
> thank you for reading! <3


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